I had a desire to go to Scotland this fall to see a dear dear friend whom I miss very much. The timing seemed perfectly aligned with my husband’s business trip to the U.K. There was a two week course being taught near her home that I had had my eye on, it all made perfect sense. I decided at once I wanted to make some extra cash to fund this trip. I embarked on finding a part-time remote position and was hired within a few days of making that decision. After a week or so of considering the Scotland trip, I had the awareness that my number one goal right now is to finish my book. I recalled how when I traveled to India, my anticipation of the upcoming trip diverted a lot of my attention. And then, after I returned from being out of the country for a month, it took another 2-3 weeks before I was back to myself again. I wondered if this two week training might have a similar effect on me. I really had to take stock about the return on investment of time, energy and the financial commitment. What I came to realize is that my rationale about how important this training was didn’t hold water, at least not with my current life goals.
It’s been about two months since all that transpired and my husband is about to leave for the U.K. tomorrow. Today, while supporting the company I’ve been working with for the past two months, one of the tasks was to clean up the transcription of their main annual event. This event brings together Christian philanthropists from all over the country for a four day retreat of learning, worshipping, connecting and expanding their networks. It’s attended by authors, TV anchors, speakers, pastors, political figures, heads of foundations and performing artists. It’s quite a gathering of many evangelical Christians. When I was hired, I let them know that my beliefs are not their beliefs and if I was required to make a declaration of faith, especially of the evangelical kind, it would never happen.
My perception of this kind of Christian is that they believe that their way is the only way and if you don’t believe like they believe then you’re not invited nor will God find favor with you. I recently commented to someone that I wish I had stronger convictions or that my convictions were lacking. However one conviction I strongly disagree with is the idea that there is one path to God. If God is a loving God, what kind of God makes himself only reachable to those who are fortunate enough to hear the message. It makes no sense. If God is only love and loves all, well, let’s just say I see it differently.
The reason I bring this up is that the assignment I was asked to do this week has me proofing the transcriptions from the conference. That means painstakingly combing through each line, sometimes several times to make sure it was captured accurately by the transcription service. Some of the subjects I’ve gotten to overhear are very near and personal to me. So much so, it has brought tears to my eyes. This morning as I jumped into the task, the first thing that came on were worship songs. And yes, I need to proof that as well, as the transcription service just butchers the lyrics. Here’s the kicker. The first song I heard was Holy Holy Holy, a song I remembered from my early days attending Catholic mass. And what I remembered specifically was looking up at my dad proudly singing alongside of him as he belted out the lyrics. My father was an incredible singer, but the volume might have been a bit much for tender ears. Nonetheless, I loved singing church songs, and I loved singing them next to my dad. Another tear.I was given homework from my coach to do while my husband is out of town. It has to do with getting still and finding my connection with spirit. Revisiting and journaling about that relationship and exploring where it’s at, I had mentioned in another post that these past few years have left me feeling a little distant from God, and I had shared with this coach that I miss that relationship. Well today my Creator waltzed into my life quite majestically. Again the irony is that I had to listen to that song a dozen times to make sure I got the lyrics all correct. It’s now stuck in my head and I’m singing it just because. Holy holy holy, Lord God Almighty, early in the morning, our song shall rise to thee. Something tells me God is letting me know he’s as close as my next breath. Something tells me that there never was a trip to Scotland in the cards at this time. That everything was pointing to this time and what was in the cards was for me to get this weird job that I never would have sought out on my own. Something tells me that this is no accident and that I’m here by Divine Appointment, I look forward to getting reacquainted.
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